I'm just going to say it...sometimes I really hate being a stay-at-home mom. There are many reasons I love it, but there are many reasons I'm not so in love with it too. However, the number one reason? There is NO ONE to turn to when she doesn't nap. No one to tell me to chill. No one to walk her around the house. No one to laugh about it with. No one. I have learned something about myself over the past couple months, I am not good with a baby who doesn't nap and instead chooses to scream at the top of her lungs. I don't feel bad she's so overtired, I feel pissed. Honestly! Does that make me a bad mom? In some people's eyes, probably. But I'm guessing they don't have kids.
To be absolutely in love with being a parent every second of every day is completely asinine. I don't understand people who say "love every second of it." WHAT?! What the hell is there to love about a screaming baby? And I'm assuming the things you don't love grows as that adorable ball of flub grows into a walking, talking toddler. Obviously, the things you do love grows also, but c'mon, "love every second"? I doubt it.
As you can probably tell, I am in the midst of a non-nap week. I have tried everything I can think of except driving myself to the nearest bar to get anywhere from 1 to 10 tequila shots. I can honestly see why stay-at-home moms are a quickly rising group of alcoholics. And I'm guessing that group is even higher for stay-at-home moms who have absolutely no support system, which is the group I would fall into. Before you all start sending me info on the 12 steps and a list of my local AA groups, I'm not an alcoholic. If I was, the tequila would have been the first thing I tried.
Currently I'm at my wit's end and I decided she's just going to have to cry it out. In 5 months, I've never had to do this. Or, I haven't done it. Well, today's the day. I just can't deal with it. Want to know what happened? She screamed at the top of her lungs for 15 minutes and has been playing quietly in her crib for the last 10 minutes. And now, it looks like she's asleep in the baby monitor. This is my cue to finally eat something and get on with a few of the things I really wanted to accomplish today.
And all of a sudden, being a stay-at-home mom doesn't suck so much anymore!
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